Sometimes, the Biggest Change Comes with the Smallest Steps
Queue classic stop-motion animation "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town". I may think Santa is a capitalism crock of shit now, but the movie was iconic in my childhood.
The prior four New Year’s past I have been less than enthusiastic. You see, I am a person who beats to their own drum; which means I row, grow, harvest and hibernate at my own rate. My calendar does not align with what anyone else thinks of, sometimes I have three years in what the rest of the world seems to celebrate as one. Ahhh time is so fabricated.
Until this year.Not because I have resigned my personal cycles, however because the natural cycles of the world and I seem to have aligned. So, here I am sitting before you, a new year and a new evolution of me.
A year ago I remember having a conversation with a friend of mine back in California that went something like this:
Me: “I just don’t think I will ever say hi to them—my Amish neighbors— I don’t want them thinking that I accept them belittling and abusing women and animals.”
Friend: “I watched breaking Amish and it’s true, they rip out the girl’s teeth to keep them from being too attractive to the men.”
Me: “I just cannot possibly allow them into my life because I am so much better and more amazing than them. They are dumb and living life wrong and everyone should live like me”
Okay, I may have been exaggerating that last part, but reflecting back it feels like that was how I was thinking and acting. How I was judging.
On Saturday I was having coffee at my other, English as the Amish call them, neighbors house. She is a good friend of mine and quite possibly the kindest human I have ever met besides my Nana. I cannot believe that I was fortunate enough to move across the street from them.
They have known the Amish for twenty plus years, since they moved to the area. When both families had children growing up around they would come together and intermingle. As the children grew up my neighbors would be the “safe space” for the Amish ones to experience just a bit of the English life. They even hid their cell phones and charged them in their garage.
A year ago my neighbors were my heroes for helping those Amish kids “break Amish”, all of the boys actually ended up leaving and being excommunicated. Today my neighbors are my heroes for accepting their neighbors, regardless of their beliefs. For knowing that no matter what being a safe space for the children of the world and providing them with support is what matters. Putting aside the world to allow us to get to know the person behind all that judgement.
So, while we were sipping coffee a couple days ago and my neighbor mentioned to me that the Amish wife living across the street had fallen off a ladder and possibly broke her hip, I cannot lie when I say that I immediately felt internal conflict.
I am a nurse, through and through. Was she in pain? Should I go check on her? Is her husband even helping her? How could he do that?
How does one’s devotion to their God keep them from possibly protecting their loved ones? At what point would a belief make me rethink seeking immediate help for my spouse? Child? Even just having a phone to call 911 for an evaluation? How? In the most truly, non-judgmental way it is awesome. Awe-inspiring. That level of devotion is so foreign to me. I don’t think it is wrong or right, better or worse. It is foreign, and I want to…not understand it, I fear I may never truly, but I still want to hear about it, in fact I want to hear about it more.
In 2025 I am replacing judgement with a deep curiosity. Fueled by love.
So what could I do?
Why, only what any good neighbor would, I made a nice hot meal to bring over. Packed it up and strutted my tush (respectfully covered of course) to my neighbors for the first time.
And you know what?
A doctor had come to their home. She was given pain medications to be kept comfortable, surgery was scheduled for today actually. Every initial judgement and assumption I had made was wrong. The Amish man, Dan, was very warm and kind. He won’t be reading this so I think I can use his name. And even if somehow, someway something ever does happen to one of my Amish neighbors I would much rather be there for them, connected, so that I could be helpful. So that I could be a safe space. They can charge their phones at my house anytime.
I’ve written about this before, the silliness of how the universe seems to make all that I speak into existence with the word “never” ultimately comes true in the most surprising ways. From me having a cat, to now me reaching out to build community with all of my neighbors.
It may be my favorite piece of myself, my ability to keep even me on my toes. For instance, I have decided to switch up my return to nursing plan. Instead of going back to an emergency room, or facility of any kind. I am going to pull a Kels and do something completely different and unique.
I am now from this moment forward:
Elizabeth Kelsey Akers, community nurse and health advocate
I am going to begin my own business. Independent, community nursing. I am going to provide respite care to families in my community. I am going to make a difference right here, with the people I see every single day. I am going to get to know all my neighbors. More importantly, I am going to let them all get to know me.
Stay tuned for the story of how I went to church, but for now, I must get some sleep, the new me has been donating and decluttering.
Thank you for being here and reading my words. In this world, with the events occurring, I find it impossible to be in this online space, sharing and not also calling attention to the genocide being committed by Israel in the Middle East. Palestine especially, but Lebanon, Syria and Yemen as well. I would like to take a specific moment to call out for attention to be paid to Dr. Hussam Abu Safiya, the director of Kumal Aswan Hospital, the sieged hospital in northern Gaza. For months he pleaded for the world to help him and he is now being help in Sde Teiman, a brutal torture camp in Israel. Hours ago his mother died of a heart attack waiting to hear for an update on her son’s well being. She never received word.
Below you will find a link to CodePink’s petition to free Dr. Abu Safiya as well as a link to find your representatives, if you are in the U.S. to contact them to demand action. I told my congressman I look forward to unseating him in the future. There are other ways to make an impact below as well. Thank you for reading my work and thank you for being in this world.
CodePink's Petition to Free Dr. Hussam Abu Safiya
GoFundMe to Help Save Fadi's Son
GoFundMe to Help Save Mohammad's Family in Gaza
GoFundMe to Help Save Bsmala's Family in Gaza
GoFundMe to Help Save Aya's Family in Gaza
GoFundMe to Help Save Amir's Family in Gaza
GoFundMe to Help Save Munir's Family in Gaza
GoFundMe to Help Save Hany's Family in Gaza
Love this one so much. Love your open mindedness and willingness to grow. And so excited for this community nursing journey!!! Keep listening to your heart and keep writing, my friend !!💗💗💗